Miss Ivy,

    I know when Mom changes brands of kibble, I can have bowel problems.  Does the same apply when she changes the flavor of kibble within the same brand?

Dear Hoomin,

    See, now, Miss Ivy has a stomach of steel and can eat just about anything.  Unfortunately, my stinky brudder has a funny tummy and he can get extra stinky with some flavors.  That boy is just not right.

    I enjoy the fish and cheekin flavors, but my stinky brudder is only allowed to eat the fish.  One day my hoomins ran out of regular food and had to feed something different.  It was not a good day, not a good day at all.

Miss Ivy,

    We are about to embark on the wonderful adventure of fostering.  We have read all the books and articles from the hoomin "experts" but we would like to hear it from a "real expert".  So from your point of view, what are the most important things we should have and know before bringing a grey home?  Thanks!

Dear Fostering Hoomin,

    You have come to the right place!  Miss Ivy is very experienced in bossing, I mean, training the new guys.  There are several things you must know.  First, practice the "dirty look".  This works well when the new guy thinks he can steal food off the counter.  I personally like to use the dirty look when they try to steal my bed.  Works everytime.  My hoomins don't do the dirty look right and end up having to say No! to get the new guy not to steal food.  Silly hoomins.

    Second, don't let them pee in the living room.

    Third, they will be stinky.  Please, for the love of all things clean, give them a baff!

    Fourth, you know my feelings on teaching those silly stairs.  I won't go there again.

Miss Ivy,

    We adopted our hound in May, and he has yet to do stairs.  We have tried it ALL, every book and trick we can think of, not even bribing works!

    Our house doesn't really require that he does stairs, our main floor is all one level, but he whines terribly if I have to go down and do laundry.

    Any suggestions?

Dear Hoomin,

    Well, well, well.  Miss Ivy is here to tell you that stairs are evil.  It took me 2 years before I would go down!  First my hoomins started by having me learn of short stairs.  Like 4 stairs.  That's easy!  Then they tried to make me go down the big set of wood stairs at home.  Um, no.  That's where Miss Ivy draws the line.  So, they picked me up and put me ON the stairs and MADE me do them!  Can you imagine!  Look at how they tortured me:

    Sure, I learned how to go down the stairs, but I was not going to be doing stairs if I had any say in the matter!  I guess they thought they would try all sorts of other stairs then - outside stairs, at friend's houses, stuff like that.  It was a nice try, really, it was.  Sometimes my hoomins are so cute, when they think they're Cesar Milan or something.

    Then one day I heard something about a white flag and then this nice soft stuff was put on the stairs, and so I decided they weren't so horrible.  Now I go up and down all by myself!  Sometimes just because I can!

    Silly hoomins, stairs are scary!

Miss Ivy,

    I thought only males marked.  But my female greyhound lifts her leg on everything out on walks!  What gives?

Confused in Bristol

Hi Confused,

'Round these parts, I'm renowed for my marking abilities!  Marking has less to do with sex, and more to do with wanted to point out to everyone else where your stuff is.  I pee on it, that's my stuff!  I love to mark other dog's beds, just to show that it's mine if I want it.  Except once it's been peed on I don't usually want it anymore, but if I did, it would be MINE.  Though not all of us ladies lift our leg, it's perfectly normal for us to mark.

Silly hoomans, how else will we know what's our territory?